I first connected to Mens Wellbeing in 1999 when my marriage was on the rocks. I somehow connected to Ross Thompson, the then president of Mens Wellbeing and who worked as a counsellor.
I was 39 years of age at the time and my old ways of operating as a man simply were not working.
Sadly my marriage did not survive, but my connection to Mens Wellbeing has remained to this day. I simply needed to learn to be a better man and I needed to reach out beyond the limitations of my childhood and upbringing for answers.
Mens Wellbeing provided an effective and safe environment with the then formulation of the Common Ground program and the general enrichment of being a man at the festivals of Manshine and Manhood.
My father was an ex-British army officer at the time World War II was drawing to a close. My Grandfather also was recruited into the British army at the time of World War I and he served for six years; miraculously he survived.
I don’t believe my father or grandfather had any ambition to be military men but it was more to do with the absolute need at that time to fight the dark forces of Nazi Germany.
My life up until the time my marriage ended was deeply rooted in these experiences of my father and grandfather; duty called to be more than just civilians enjoying the freedom that much of my generation have been able to enjoy to this day.
In 2003 I was asked by Chris Johnson, the then president of Mens Wellbeing, to visit the Powerlink property at Mt Byron, some two hours drive north-west of Brisbane.
My profession as a carpenter and builder immediately fell in love with the Rock house as it became known and for the next fifteen years I was dedicated to the restoration of this house that is bolted to rock and cantilevers out over the gorge of Reedy Creek.
My father, my son and many other good men helped me over this fifteen year period to renovate the house, build the long house, water stands and renovate the stairs down from the Rock house, no easy feat.
My last job in 2019 was to paint the external timber work of the Rock house with the view of protecting the house for another twenty years. Two friends helped me with this very specialised job. Sadly we are losing the lease with Powerlink in January 2026 but grateful we are for such a gift for over twenty years. Powerlink offered the fifty acre property for $1/year; a testimony to the good work Men’s Wellbeing carried out under this generous lease.
In 2001 I was invited to join the West End Men’s Group with Robert A’hoon, Ron Heard, David King, Don Gibson and other good men. This was another fifteen year love affair for me and my introduction to communicating with men in a way that matters; there was no need for masks and pretence.
I went onto to do several Common Ground programs; I became a committee member for both Manhood and Manshine; described as a twelve month workshop; working with up to eight or more other men all pushing for these important weekend festivals to be something unique and most of all ‘masculine’.
Since 1999 to the present day I have seen Mens Wellbeing grow from a grass roots organisation to a very sophisticated organisation doing great work in helping and offering so much opportunity for men who to this day remain the highest in suicide rates.
Mens Wellbeing for me has provided a raft for closer friendships that offer a more mature and enriching support in these challenging times for men and the rest of humanity.
These days I’ve become a grandad to my son’s daughter, now just two months old. I have two other adult daughters who I love immensely for their bravery and strength as they navigate a very different world from the one I grew up in.
I was a stay at home father renovating two homes in the Wynnum Manly area. My children got to know me ‘warts and all’ as I renovated these homes in my children’s presence and with lots of help from supportive grandparents.
My former wife was an international flight attendant who was away ten days out of fourteen; little wonder our marriage failed but her skills as a mother I can certainly vouch for and despite our differences she remains a committed and strong mother for our children.
I think my connection to my children to this day and their acceptance of my failures and ‘good bits’ has built the basis to our connection. I was a ‘stay at home dad’ who took them to kindy and primary school; who attended their special events and sporting activities for a period of seven years. I also took them on many camping adventures to Lake Eyre, the Simpson Desert and Lamington National Park to name a few.
Through all of this family journey there has been Mens Wellbeing and the raft of connection I can still call on to this day. Just last year I was the Elder on the Manhood Committee with six other wonderful young men who showed me so much.
In October this year I turn 64; a junior Elder I like to call myself but in all of this is the raft of support of Mens Wellbeing that holds the key to being an effective man in these turbulent times.
My gratitude goes out to all the men I have connected with in the last twenty-six years; this has been a blessing beyond measure.
I look forward to meeting you at an Elder event, at Manhood, at Manshine or one of the many zoom meetings now on offer through this ever growing organisation that was started in humble beginnings to the professional organisation Mens Wellbeing is today.